We have been together for 11 years now, married for the last 6 of those. As soon as we knew our relationship was serious we talked about the possibility of children in the future. I knew I wanted a family at some point, DH wasn’t so sure. He told me that it was my decision ultimately, but when I suggested it was time to start a family he was already thinking the same thing and was ready too. Today is the 1 year anniversary of when we knew for sure that a baby was propagating, and it has been an interesting journey. A woman becomes a mother as soon as she knows she is carrying a child. A man doesn’t become a father until he holds his child for the first time. Pregnancy was a difficult time for him, as I was able to hold and protect my unborn child, but all he could do was watch from a distance, concerned about me but unable to do anything to ease the burden.
He always had his doubts about whether he could be a good dad, but I know that when he puts his mind to something he does it well. The moment he held T for the first time he was a dad, whether he liked it or not. I’m pretty sure he liked it! There are fun times, amazing times as we watch T conquer a new skill, but there are also struggles. There always will be as this is a very steep learning curve, but the beauty of there being 2 of us is that when things get a bit overwhelming, the other parent can take over for a while.
Watching the two of them together makes my heart melt. The giggles, the squeals of pure joy, the times they fall asleep together… I think that all you can do to be a good parent is to be there, and to do your best. No-one is perfect, we will make mistakes, but we love T unconditionally, and that is all that matters in the end.